Simple Tips to Get Better at Small Talk
Imagine you're at work, waiting for a meeting to begin, and you're sitting next to someone who you don't know too well.
There are a number of different things you can do while you wait — you might take out your phone or doodle on a piece of paper.
Or perhaps you'll make some "small talk" with the person next to you.
Small talk is polite conversation about things that are not very important, such as the weather. It's often something you do with people you don't know very well.
Some of us hate it, but if you never know what to say, there are some easy ways to get better at it.
At least, that's according to communication expert Charles Duhigg.
Writing for CNBC, Duhigg — who has won the prestigious Pulitzer Prize for journalism — says you should try asking people deep questions, not shallow ones.
For example, instead of asking "Where do you live?" you could say "What do you like about where you live?"
Good questions should let people answer with feelings, not facts, according to Duhigg.
Duhigg adds that you should then be ready to ask follow-up questions. "Don't stop with just one question," he says.
Another communication expert, Matt Abrahams from Stanford University, says that follow-up questions or statements can be very simple — for example: "Tell me more."
Don't use someone's reply as an excuse to begin talking about yourself, Abrahams says — ask them more about what they've said.
However, others say you do have to be careful about the things you talk about. It might be better not to ask about religion or politics when you're making small talk — and don't get too personal too soon!
