How to Beat 'Impostor Syndrome'
Have you experienced impostor syndrome? It's that feeling that you might be a fraud, that you don't belong, or that you're not as good as people think you are.
Maybe you got a promotion or won an award, but instead of celebrating, you feel like you really just tricked everybody — and someone might find out.
Estimates have found that about 70% of us experience impostor syndrome at some time in our lives. It might be just for a few weeks in a new job, or it could last a lifetime.
Former first lady Michelle Obama has openly admitted to having impostor syndrome. So has Harry Potter actor Emma Watson.
In 2013, Watson told Rookie magazine that it felt like the better she did, the more inadequate she felt. "Any moment, someone's going to find out I'm a total fraud, and that I don't deserve any of what I've achieved," she said.
According to communications expert Lou Solomon, anxiety, perfectionism, self-doubt and fear of failure are the symptoms of impostor syndrome.
She says it's like having a villain in your ear saying things like, "You don't deserve to be here — these people are really smart." Or they might say that even though you succeeded once, you might not be able to do it again.
But once you recognize your villain, you can fight them. You might even give them a name. Solomon calls hers "Miss Vader," after Darth Vader from Star Wars. She has also imagined a hero — "Betty Lou" — who challenges Miss Vader every time she says something negative.
Experts also suggest exchanging negative thoughts for positive ones by celebrating achievements, thinking about past successes and keeping a record of positive feedback from others.
Solomon agrees that impostor syndrome isn't something you fight alone. It's also important to pay attention to friends, family and coworkers, and be sure to let them know when they're really good at something. "Listen for brilliance," she says.
